I finally have the courage to write this:
I lost you more than a year ago
But it feels like it’s been decades since I last saw you, heard your voice
The giggles we shared and our inside jokes is what I miss the most
Every time I put my hair up in a style that you used to braid your hair, I’m reminded of you
I miss you during times when I’m happy, sad, angry, calm; I miss you regardless of what I feel
When you left us, I was at loss of words
I was searching for the intense love and care that you had pampered me with never to find it anywhere
Your love spoilt me but also made me to love and value myself more than anything else in the world
But I wonder will I ever be able to love myself the way you loved me
There never was any love that could overwrite the love you had for me; never shall be
Perhaps the love that I was looking for can never be found and I’m at peace
I’m grateful that you visit me in my dreams to envelope me in warmth and plant pecks
Am I selfish to miss your love more than anything else
I can not only say that you’re the best mom in the world but that there never was and never will be a mother like you in the universe
The way you called me with several nicknames to cheer me up when I’m sad
I miss every word that you said, your beautiful smile I yearn to see
I might cry a million tears but I recall your words “silly gal, why do you cry”
I value your words and I’m gonna try my best to follow them
Your patience and altruism made us fall in love with you all over again and again
You didn’t need words to express how much we meant to you
Your silence spoke words that we all heard and understood
You taught me to be kind and patient and I am trying, momma
Your words etched in my heart; “Allah is watching; always do good, expect nothing in return”
Everything’s changed since you left; the moments I hoped you’d be elated to be a part of
Somehow I feel you watch me from above and are smiling for every step I take to move forward in life
I regret the moments I might have been away from you; I know I’ll never get you back
But I promise I’ll meet you someday where we shall sit down and have endless conversations
All I wish to see is your smiling face with so much adoration in your eyes
I’m at peace ❤️
Love,
Baba, Bhaiyya, and Asma
Poetry 